Then What?

Into this box – old paints and thinners and primers and stains and cleaners and brushes.  Take it away. Into that box - broken phones and batteries, cords and cameras no longer blinking.  Take it away. On the porch - books and clothes and more books and more clothes, and stuff and stuff and stuff.  Take it away.  Please take it away. And paintings from the walls, and dishes from the shelves, and papers and papers and papers.  I beg of … [Read more...]

The Energy of Things

gloves small

This piece has been a while coming as I’ve looked about our home deciding what on earth to do with all of Mike’s things. “There is no rush, take your time.  Things have energy and you will know when it is time.”  This was the wisdom of Ziri Rideaux, the fabulous woman from Friends Funeral Home, who helped guide me through the process. As we sat there, Elise and I, trying to absorb this new reality, she reminded me that everything was … [Read more...]

Angels Everywhere

bench

Over and over I’ve expressed my great thanks to family and friends, old and new, for their amazing outpouring of love and support. Though not religious in any formal tradition, I’ve come to call them my angels and feel blessed to be surrounded by so many. But the story I’m about to share taught me that angels are everywhere, in all walks of life, all shapes and sizes, sometimes when we least expect it. It was a week after Mike had passed away … [Read more...]

Cracked Open.

line in sand

What is the jumping point for this writing?  Where do I begin?  You are joining me mid-chapter.  So perhaps I need to bring you up to date.  On May 8, my husband Mike went in for a simple surgery.  Two and a half hours and a thousand sorries later, they told me he was gone.  That day has become my line in the sand, life before he passed away and then the everything after. As any who have experienced loss it is a rollercoaster of emotions.  His … [Read more...]

Beast Of Change

volcano

There is an earthquake happening.  Tectonic plates are shifting and the Old Ones want to keep it all intact, all in place.  The lava of change is flowing; the universe has heard the call and it is moving forward.  And it is a wave, a giant wave of upheaval and light: a black becoming white, or yellow, or purple. And in the great discomfort is the change.  There are molecules forming and reforming in new patterns, new habits.    And in the … [Read more...]

Sacred Summer Hike to Topanga

summerhike

They say that First Tuesday meetings are different than most.  And this summer hike up in Topanga was no exception.  Fifteen women, accompanied by the howls of the coyotes and the dance of a dozen fireflies, made their way up to a plateau in Topanga Canyon to experience the setting sun and the joy of sisterhood. We stood hand in hand, taking in the scent and sounds of the mountain, allowing that connection to seep into our souls.  It was the … [Read more...]

Water Retains The Memories

pregnantwomanbathing

They say that water retains the memories. Ah, so what do mine remember? They remember a belly large like a whale’s and a dark line that ran down from rib to pubic bones. They remember the sensation of a babe shifting inside. They remember as the waters inside discovered the waters outside, and how they reached for each other in recognition, my little one turning somersaults in delight. They remember the fear I felt when I stepped into … [Read more...]

Impromptu Monterey Adventure

monterey-harbor

>I think sometimes the best way to travel is to make few plans and have even fewer expectations.  Such was our impromptu trip to Monterey this January.  We were amazingly fortunate with the weather, warm blue skies and a three day holiday.  So last minute, we piled up the buggy and headed north.  The only things on the agenda – a stop for  lunch and quick hug for my daughter in San Luis Obispo, and a visit to the world famous Monterey … [Read more...]

Do Trees Dream?

oak_tree-11911

In a strip 4 x 8, they pile the dirt.  And in the dirt they dig a hole.  And in the hole they put a tree.  It is a young tree, delicate limbs, thin bark, roots just beginning to spread. The box is split, the tree hauled out, and it is plopped in the ground with little care and less grace.  A tablet is tossed in, a splash of water, and the dirt is piled back around it.  On either side two stakes are pounded in, and wires trap it tightly in … [Read more...]

Mentor Ring Takes Flight

One moment it is a whisper of an idea.  The next it is a bunch of folks sitting in a living room, the vision taking shape and moving forward. There were twelve of us that evening, sitting appropriately, in a circle; the first incarnation of the Mentor Ring.  We were a group of women and men committed to the idea of giving back, paying it forward.  All of us were busy, with more than enough on our plates, but for some reason when the call went … [Read more...]